I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
