I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize