I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
We had to coat check the pizza.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize