I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
