it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
