weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
