Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
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