i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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