I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Randomize
