i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
