my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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