Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
