i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
he high fived his dick after we had sex
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize