so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
The adults are the big ones right?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
