I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Naked Twister starts at high noon
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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