rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
