This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I wish you could order shots online.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
