U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
