i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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