She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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