An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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