i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
honey bunches of taint.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Can you bring me the toilet please
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize
