I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
