i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize