is your mom at the bar?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
