Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
