I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
