But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
