Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
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I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
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Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home