we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
