think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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