he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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