I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Just pee around me
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
