You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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