yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
