I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
This girl is more easily done than said...
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Let's get the cat blown out
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
