Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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