i don't want you to think of me as your TA
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
