so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
it glows. i had to have it.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
