Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
