fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize