She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
