hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
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