Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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