i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
