well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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