im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
