i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Randomize
