Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
he puts the penis in happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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