it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The uberlube is also flammable
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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