Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
