these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
